Since my grandsons went back to Oregon, I have been fighting a deep depression. I only get to see them maybe twice a year. On the phone, the older one will carry on a conversation, but the younger on is too antsy at his great age of eight, so keeping in touch is a challenge and I am more of a hands on Grandma. I got the pictures back from their visit and my care provider, Alicia, got some great shots. One of my favorite pictures is where Colten, Justin and I are sitting on the floor and Colten is talking. Justin and I are intently listening to him, fully engaged in the conversation. There are a great couple of funny shots. The first one shows the three of us with our butts sticking up in the air looking for a “Big Bug” that Alicia announced was behind the couch, so there we were…investigating at a safe distance. The second shot shows the three of us lounging on the couch after our “rightous kill”.

Continuing with our photo shoot, Alicia put a fleece sheet on my bed and the three of us pounced on our new home with pizza, juice, ice cream and lot of napkins. There is a great picture of us not knowing anyone was looking, so we are eating with gusto. The looks on our faces were extremely proud and canabalistic. We had TWO kinds of meat, Justin kept saying.  We were proud to gourging ourselves on Grandma’s fleece sheet. It was thick and soft, perfect to watch movies on and EAT! Woops, almost forgot the angelic strawberry iced cookies from my favorite store. MMMMMMM The two boys are good for my appetite.

I had eaten a wheat cereal that has a lot of fiber in it so I wouldn’t have bowel problems while the boys were here. Maybe I couldn’t garantee it, but it was less likely to be a problem and I would be able to eat small bits. Alicia and I had a plan B and the cereal worked, but a little too well and I was still very weak when the boys got here, but they never new that. My care giver did, but not the boys. We played, talked and thoughoughly enjoyed each other all day. One of the pictures I have from their visit is Colten with the electric harp, just as he is looking up. He is 11, but he looks like a rocker that has been on the road awhile and he is hung over himself. Not a good image, but a realistic scenario.

As I sat there and watched the boys check out the school supplies that I got them, I was in a lot of pain, but not enough to take this day from me. I try not to let it take many, but there are those days that refuse to ge ignored. Not Today! They weren’t too rough on me, but you know boys, they have to show they are “strong”. They wore me out, but at the same time I wish the day would never had to end. I  have a photo album for that day that I hope gets back to them…my boys.

 Since their visit, I have been trying to get back to the routine of cooking with fresh ingredients and listening to my meditation tapes to get my stomach nice and relaxed so I can stuff it. Lying on my side as I massage my stomach while it digests (this helps a lot).  I backed off on the B6 and iron so we’ll see where I stand now. It should be pretty stable. I do what I have learned is best and my blood work tells me if I am succeeding. Sounds like some sort of game…I wish.

This is my life, you take care and I will write again soon,

Elaine